Archive for May, 2009

OMG! OBAMA DATE NIGHT! WTH?

May 31, 2009

This is one of many negative news articles about this arrogant president’s “Date Night”.

You Wanted Change, Well Here It Is!

Personally I don’t care to hear about “date night” with the Obama’s or anyone else unless it my date night lol.  I think it’s just the media’s affair with them.

My husband and I have date nights.  Most of the time it’s dinner out or we like to go hang out at a local cigar lounge and play cards.  That’s what we enjoy the most.  It’s a cheap night out too.  Sometimes we may go bowling, or take a quick trip to Winstar.

So when the President and first lady go out….they go out in style….their date night couldn’t consist of dinner and a movie locally.  Nope, they have to take a jet to NYC for a Broadway play.  Now I don’t know about you, but that’s not a date!  Well, unless you have bottomless pockets to pay for it. It’s absurd!  Remember folks, that’s OUR dime paying for that jet, that fuel, and security to just name a few.  Remember when the airport is shut down and no planes can go in or out for an hour or two and you are stuck waiting, that’s because HIS plane is in range or landing.  When you are late getting to your play on Broadway (or whatever else you have planned) that’s because the limo, and their escorts are closing down the freeway so they can get to the play on time.

I’M SORRY, BUT A DATE NIGHT IN NYC for a broadway play?  That’s just a slap in the face to every taxpaying person in this country!

Geesh!  The money we spent for his little flirting with the media…..I wonder, had he not been the President, would he have just jetted off like that.

This man is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy out of control with money.  Does he have a tree growing bills somewhere I wonder?  Or does he think that’s where it’s coming from?  In the real world, we have budgets, and we stick to it.  As long as we keep paying, he’ll keep spending….and when we stop paying, he will probably continue spending…oh wait, that’s already happened.

Of course, if Obama paid for this entire date himself, including the pilot, first officer, security detail, jet fuel, landing fees, limo, gas, etc. etc. etc.  I’ll shut my mouth and apologize.  If not….let it rip!

It is being reported that this “Date Night” cost the US Taxpayers approximately $100,000.00.  $100,000.00 of your hard earned dollars.  $100,000.00 of your tax dollars.  $100,000.00.  Unbelievable.

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JOANASS BROTHERS LEAVE HOMELESS MAN FOR DEAD

May 29, 2009

By C. Kent, reporter, World Daily Planet News

Violence escalates in Europe!

Violence escalates in Europe!

Friday morning started as any other day for the owner of Happy Market in New Deli until he opened his front door and discovered the badly battered and bruised man laying in the gutter. According to the shop owner Mr. M. Cyrus, the victim’s dying words were “It was those Joanass brothers! Why, why? They stole my ipod!”. The victim, Fozzee Bear, was admitted to the Mengele Clinic in Frankfurter where he was pronounced dead after several hours of experimental surgery and organ harvesting. Interpolish is on a global manhunt for the perpetrators and are seeking to interview the Joanass brothers. Calls to their publicist have been forwarded to Mickey at Walt Disney World. Detective inspector Clouseau stated in a telephone interview that the two suspects are either the Joanass brothers or the Pirates of the Caribbean.

Please see related article regarding the tragic death of Fozee’s best friend Kermitt.

PLEASE REMEMBER TO WASH THROROUGHLY!

May 28, 2009
You STINK man!!

You STINK man!!

by IAN AL Simers

Please remember to wash thoroughly when you bathe! That means EVERYTHING! Or you will STINK! Check out the cajones on this critter! Looks like he got a set of MONSTER NUTS! (Oh how I envy him) But he obviously hasn’t washed in a long, long time!

HI KIDS! I’M THE HANDI-DOUGHNUT MAN!

May 23, 2009

by J. Olsen, cub-reporter for the World Daily Planet News, Metropolis

FUDGE PACKERS UNITE! IT’S THE HANDI-DOUGHNUT MAN! What a physique! I just want to lick his smooth, silky, creamy hole until the ecstacy overwhelms me with shivers and breathlessness. Just one look at this photo and you’ll feel the same. He told me his name is DJ Rellas. But to me he is muy sauve and all macho.

COME LICK ME!

COME LICK ME!

BIG GAME HUNTERS BAG MASSIVE KILL!

May 22, 2009

by C. Kent, reporter World Daily Planet News, Metropolis

Just returned from a safari to the farthest reaches of Barafrica.  Here is an exclusive photo of two Safari Hunters International members posing next to their trophy kill. The carcass will be stuffed and shown at the Smithsonian next year. Good work gentlemen, get ya a case of beer for that one!  YOU HAVE BALLS!

No match for properly armed MEN!

No match for properly armed MEN!

OBAMA Controversy ended!

May 21, 2009

OBAMA born in Barafrica as reported by the World Daily Planet News in Metropolis by C. Kent.

Reporter Kent just landed with this ground breaking revelation.  He discovered speaking to the Muleatto tribe  from southeast Barafrica who raised him after his mother, A. Jackal, died after giving birth under the briar thorns.

Since he was born in Africa/Hawaii/Indonesia experts at National Geographic used NASA shuttle and Hubble space photos to determine the boundaries of this new land known as: Barafrica.  As seen from space, the area resembles a set of MONSTER truck nuts.

THE PERFECT GIFT FOR YOUR ELECTED OFFICIALS!

May 21, 2009

GUNS ARE BAD, UMKAY.  SO WE’LL JUST TAKE THEM AWAY FROM YOU AND USE THEM FOR OUR OWN PROTECTION!

GO AHEAD . . . MAKE MY DAY! :)

GO AHEAD . . . MAKE MY DAY! 🙂

MAN GOES INSANE OVER CALIFORNIA BUDGET CRISIS! LOSES BENEFITS, EATS SON’S EYES!

May 20, 2009

Posted Tuesday, May 19, 2009.

THIS HAS TO BE ONE OF THE SIGNS OF THE APOCALYPSE!

Look away now if you are squeamish! Read the following story from bakersfield.com

Bakersfield dad accused of biting out son’s eye

This poor little boy will never see again.

This poor little boy will never see again.


| Friday, May 15 2009 10:27 AM

Last Updated Friday, May 15 2009 04:17 PM

A Bakersfield father is accused of biting out one of the eyes of his small child and similarly mutilating the other eye, leaving the child blind.

After attacking the child, 34-year-old Angel Vidal Mendoza Sr. quickly left his apartment in a wheelchair, entered a backyard of a nearby vacant home and attacked his own legs with an ax, severely injuring himself, Bakersfield police reported.

The child, 4-year-old Angelo Mendoza Jr., later told police, “My daddy ate my eyes.”

Doctors at Mercy Hospital said it is unknown whether the child will regain vision in his right eye.

Child Protective Services cannot discuss the case, CPS program director Brian Parnell said. But in cases of serious abuse, the child is taken into protective custody, he said.

Some foster homes have specialized medical training, but more such people are needed, he said.

The boy’s mother, Desirae Marie Bermudez, 23, was not present during the incident. There is a $15,000 warrant for her arrest for failing to complete a drug treatment program in late 2008, court documents say.

A search warrant report said the father “was displaying symptoms of being under the influence of PCP.”

Both he and Bermudez were charged with being under the influence of PCP in a 2006 criminal case. Both pleaded no contest to child endangerment charges in that case, records say.

So why was the boy still living with the father?

CPS officials say there has to pretty much be serious physical abuse — major bruises or broken bones — before a child is taken away from his parents automatically.

In cases where parents are using drugs, CPS will definitely check on the child, Parnell said. But they won’t necessarily remove the child. That all depends on the extent of the drug abuse or the availability of other care — relatives or neighbors — for the children, he said.

The incident happened in the early evening of April 28 at the apartment the father and son share at 422 Ohio Drive near Terrace Way and Madison Street in southeast Bakersfield.

Police and search warrant reports say:

On the morning of April 28, Mendoza asked neighbor Elizabeth Rodriguez, 36, for a ride to a work-related appointment later in the day.

At 6 p.m., she sent her 12-year-old son to get Mendoza. The boy said Mendoza opened his door slightly and looked nervous, but didn’t let him in. Mendoza said he would be right out.

But a few minutes later, Rodriguez saw Mendoza rolling his wheelchair quickly away.

The 12-year-old boy and another neighbor went to Mendoza’s apartment and discovered the child on the floor.

Meanwhile, witnesses told police a man was yelling and screaming in a wheelchair from the backyard and hitting his legs with an ax.

Mendoza, who remains in custody in lieu of $1 million bail, is charged with mayhem, torture, child cruelty and inflicting an injury to a child. He’s scheduled for a May 20 hearing. THAT’S TOMORROW! DOES ANYONE HAVE $100K LAYING AROUND GATHERING DUST? BAIL OUT THIS PIECE OF SHIT AND SEND HIM TO COURT IN SEVERAL BOXES!
PLEASE SAVE POOR CALIFORNIA THE COSTS OF PROSECUTING THIS LOW-LIFE WASTE-OF-SPACE.  IAN AL SIMERS 🙂

His criminal history dates back to 1998 and includes convictions for drugs, battery, check forgery and a misdemeanor child endangerment, SO IF HE DROPPED OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH, NO-ONE WOULD MISS HIM! 😉

BELOVED CELEBRITY FOUND DEAD IN CRACK DEN!

May 16, 2009

Beloved Kermitt the Frog was found today during a raid at a crack house in one of Los Angeles’ most dangerous neighborhoods. The medical examiner determined that Kermitt died of an overdose three days ago and his decomposing body was only discovered when police started a thorough search of the crack house.  Kermitt’s fame has waned over the years since his huge popularity in the 1980’s and early 1990’s. He sunk deeper and deeper into drug and alcohol abuse, having many arrests for possession and driving under the influence. Once a close companion of Kermitt, Miss Piggie, when asked for comment said,  “the little green bastard has finally found his peace in death. I think I’m in the mood for some frogs legs!”

Kermit waves goodbye.

Kermitt waves goodbye.

JUST WHAT THE DOCTOR ORDERED!

May 16, 2009

I was checking out shower chairs and I happened upon this photo. Ya know there is nothing I hate more than getting that urgent B.M. message just when I am getting into the shower. Well now I don’t have to worry about that anymore and I don’t have to mash it down the drain with my foot.

IAN AL Simers 🙂

NOW I CAN SHIT WHILE I SHOWER! I JUST LOVE AMERICA!

NOW I CAN SHIT WHILE I SHOWER! I JUST LOVE AMERICA!

FOR THE TWO-FACED AMABO!

May 16, 2009

CAUGHT THIS IN A BRIEF MOMENT WHEN HE COULD NOT HOLD HIS SHAPE!

TwoHeadedBaby_devilbaby

Aw, don't cry, it's just a 2nd degree burn!

The Usual Suspects – ACTUAL BOOKING PHOTOS

May 13, 2009

Here’s something you don’t see just anywhere!
These are actual booking photos–what do they all have in common?

An excellent representative sample of Amabo Voters!

They are an excellent representative sample of Amabo Voters!

LOSERS!

Yeah, we’re bad….We’re bad in a Bunch!

May 11, 2009
We are watching you!

We are watching you!

HEY MAN, WHATTA YOU LOOKIN' AT?

HEY MAN, WHATTA YOU LOOKIN' AT?

Have you checked your shoes lately? We used them instead of the cat box!

Where’s my kitty?
Please bring him home; we are all just about completely healed!

Please bring him home; we are all just about completely healed!


Check out the video of  Maime, the talking cat!

File this one under “DUH!”

May 10, 2009

Monday, February 09, 2009
Star Parker :: Townhall.com Columnist

Back on Uncle Sam’s Plantation

by Star Parker


Six years ago I wrote a book called Uncle Sam’s Plantation. I wrote the book to tell my own story of what I saw living inside the welfare state and my own transformation out of it.

I said in that book that indeed there are two Americas — a poor America on socialism and a wealthy America on capitalism.

I talked about government programs like Temporary Assistance for Needy Families (TANF), Job Opportunities and Basic Skills Training (JOBS), Emergency Assistance to Needy Families with Children (EANF), Section 8 Housing, and Food Stamps.

A vast sea of perhaps well-intentioned government programs, all initially set into motion in the 1960s by Democrats, that were going to lift the nation’s poor out of poverty.

A benevolent Uncle Sam welcomed mostly poor black Americans onto the government plantation.  Those who accepted the invitation switched mindsets from “How do I take care of myself?” to “What do I have to do to stay on the plantation?”

Instead of solving economic problems, government welfare socialism created monstrous moral and spiritual problems — the kind of problems that are inevitable when individuals turn responsibility for their lives over to others.

The legacy of American socialism is our blighted inner cities, dysfunctional inner city schools, and broken black families.

Through God’s grace, I found my way out. It was then that I understood what freedom meant and how great this country is.

I had the privilege of working on welfare reform in 1996 which was passed by a Republican controlled Congress.

I thought we were on the road to moving socialism out of our poor black communities and replacing it with wealth-producing American capitalism.

But, incredibly, we are now going in the opposite direction.

Instead of poor America on socialism becoming more like rich American on capitalism, rich America on capitalism is becoming like poor America on socialism.

Uncle Sam has welcomed our banks onto the plantation and they have said, “Thank you, Suh.”

Now, instead of thinking about what creative things need to be done to serve customers, they are thinking about what they have to tell Massah in order to get their cash.

There is some kind of irony that this is all happening under our first black president on the 200th anniversary of the birthday of Abraham Lincoln.

Worse, socialism seems to be the element of our new young president. And maybe even more troubling, our corporate executives seem happy to move onto the plantation.

In an op-ed on the opinion page of the Washington Post, Mr. Obama is clear that the goal of his trillion dollar spending plan is much more than short term economic stimulus.

“This plan is more than a prescription for short-term spending — it’s a strategy for America ‘s long-term growth and opportunity in areas such as renewable energy, healthcare, and education.”

Perhaps more incredibly, Obama seems to think that government taking over an economy is a new idea. Or that massive growth in government can take place “with unprecedented transparency and accountability.”

Yes, sir, we heard it from Jimmy Carter when he created the Department of Energy, the Synfuels Corporation, and the Department of Education.

Or how about the Economic Opportunity Act of 1964 — The War on Poverty — which President Johnson said “…does not merely expand old programs or improve what is already being done. It charts a new course. It strikes at the causes, not just the consequences of poverty..”

Trillions of dollars later, black poverty is the same. But black families are not, with triple the incidence of single-parent homes and out-of-wedlock births.

It’s not complicated. Americans can accept Barack Obama’s invitation to move onto the plantation. Or they can choose personal responsibility and freedom.

Does anyone really need to think about what the choice should be?

About The Author


Star Parker is a nationally syndicated columnist through the Scripps Howard News Service and a regular commentator on CNN, MSNBC, and FOX News, as well as author of White Ghetto: How Middle Class America Reflects Inner City Decay.

Send My Regards to DC!

May 3, 2009
AMABO marks his territory!

AMABO marks his territory!

Hasn’t anyone noticed this? He appears to be urniating on a chair in the White House! Well, why would this surprise us? He hasn’t shown anything or anyone any respect since moving in. What is next, dropping a dump in the oval office? Bad AMABO, bad, bad!

So my sentiments are:

retardedcat1